Pre-Season Meaningless game.

The best thing about the pre-season is also the worst. If your team losses, it's doesn't matter and if they win... it still doesn't matter.
Seahawks vs. Chargers could be boiled down to this: Our first string was better than their first string and our second string was worst than their second string. And the best part of the game, a beautiful 31-yard TD pass pass between Matt Hasselbeck and his new BBF, Deion Branch
early in the game. And even though i can't find a clip on you tube of this (sorry jeremy kelly) my heart will go on. Another pleasent surprise, the great work by Ben Obomanu, the Seahawk's receiver who's name i will mispronounce forever.

For some great pictures and notes follow the link that this text contains, slut.

Big Daddy Drew's Comments from 'Kissing Suzy Kolber'
"A couple thoughts from last night’s game:

-Matt Hasselbeck should not be wearing see-through baseball hats.

-All QB’s now get a green button on their helmets that they can use to activate their communications systems. Byron Leftwich plans to use the button repeatedly during the course of the season to order his traditional 3rd quarter Triple Monster Thickburger from Hardee’s.

-Ed Hochuli, Mike Carey has seen your luscious bis and tris and has decided he ain’t taking that shit lying down. Last night, Carey showed off two lean, powerful Howitzers encased in sleeves tighter than a weisswurst casing. Carey has fired his shot across the bow, Hochuli. You better step it up if you want to be one of the token “regular” people chosen for People’s 50 Most Beautiful."

.... I have no idea what that last one means but i'll be wikipediaing 'mike carey' 'howitzers' and 'wisswurst casing' tonight.

that is all

Britney, Lindsay and Paris's Voice Mail

Dear Readers… all two of them

The following is a voice mail received that might explain a lot about recent tabloid controversies. I think we can all admit that the following will elucidate and leave you speechless. After I heard it, I know I had to give credit to true queens of media. I have to admit, this is the only way for it to end with dignity. Truly, any other way and I would have hated these women forever.

Voice Mail Received On WDWN Hot Line:

Britney: Hey ya’ll! It’s Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton and we’re leaving this message for Who Did What Now to let ya’ll know that we got you! (*tittering guffaws*)We so got you and you were all reading everything me Lindsay and Paris did. We thought it all out and made so much money off of everything. (*giggle giggle*) Oh here’s how it goes. Those paparazzi were always so in our faces so I started thinkin’ maybe we could, like, get back at them by using ‘em.

Paris: That was my idea, Britney.

Britney: (*smacks lips*) Nu-uuuh!

Lindsay: Britney came up with it, Paris.

Paris: (*tisk*) Shut up F.C. !

(*message interrupted by something that sounds like a pillow fight*)

Britney: (*out of breath*) Ok! Ok, so what we did was decided to, um, act as crazy as possible and it was a contest to…

Paris: No, stop. First we bought all the stocks, right? We bought stocks for, like, the major publishers of all of these tabloids. And then we had a competition to see how crazy we could be for the paparazzi. Ha ha ha!

Lindsay: It was super fun. Yeah. We did everything. But yeah, Paris won.

Paris: Prison! I mean, yeah, right? That was, really crazy. I can’t believe normal people thought I was so stupid and poor to go to jail.

Britney: Nah, nah, ya’ll! I totally won because of the hair thing, and the rehab thing?

Lindsay: Whoa whoa whoa…I got DUI's... plural and I crashed my car and I am the queen of rehab. Eleven days between being arrested and getting out.

Britney: Uuh uhh! No, little muffin! Nah! What about the OK! Magazine thing! I flipped out at a tabloid interview. That magazine sold out everywhere! Nichole’s ex-assistant couldn’t even find it for her.

Paris: That was amazing, Britney. But it wasn’t like CNN devoted and entire day to you as you go to jail in front of America. (*tisk*).

Lindsay: Anyways, we just wanted you guys to know that, you know, you were wrong to think because we’re famous that we’re stupid. Yeah and I think, that it’s sad how much time normal people waste caring about who I sleep with or what I do when I go out.

Paris: Right? Get a lives, and jobs, and showers, so many of you smell.

Britney: Yeah, because ya’ll are like people and you’re wanting to know stuff but we don’t chase you guys around with cameras.

Paris: And we just made a killing because we’ve sold all our stock.

Britney: Yeah so (*raspberry noise*)!

Lindsay: Post this up, WDWN! Wooooh!