Make Up Murders

This is what we're doing to our lashes, people. We're putting tubes on the end of them. Is it just me or does the graphic on the magnified lash scare you a little. How big do our lashes need to be?!
Watch through second 25...


Tubes of gook, formed by arrows (sorry for the video being in tongues) formed by arrows! AND AND...!

Stabbing loved ones in the eyes, there i said it. 

Pineapple Express: Review

3.5 stars out of 5

7.4 stars out of 10

Directed by David Gordon Green

Staring Seth Rogen and James Franco

For personal reasons, I wanted this movie to be amazing. And it was, for at least the first half. I love any movie in which all of the paranoid pot derived delusions of the protagonists are spot on and keep them one step in front of the bad guys. I couldn’t begin to keep track of all the quotable moments, since they were so rapid fire that the laughing from one blended into the laughing at the next. I really loved seeing this on imdb: “In the scene where Dale and Saul are beating up Red in his house, Red's cold sore first appears, then disappears, then appears again”. Extra half a star for a disappearing cold sore whether it was make-up or brought to the set by the actor Danny McBride.

But somewhere at the halfway point, the quick witted pot-talk went stale and the action scenes turned into boring shoot outs in which no one seems to say down. By the time the fourth assumed-to-be down bad guy was reanimated, I had checked out. I must blame this on the direction of David Gordon Green who’s other films include the critically acclaimed and Roeper’s hot pick ‘Snow Angels’, a film that has been on my “to see” list for a while. His lack of experience with the action genre killed this movie and is making me reconsider my unquestioning love for anything attached to the producer, Judd Apaptow. It was good to see old friends, Seth Rogen and James Franco, pair up on screen. It takes me back to the good old days of “Freaks and Geeks”, the Apatow directed short lived TV series. My recommendation is then to see this film written by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg IF you can pay matinee prices and be high as balls.
Call me if you need anything.

Trouble: Pass It On

I Hope You Enjoy! 

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Sarcastic Thank You

Happy Saturday Everyone!

From the bottom of my heart, i'd like to say, thank you so much everyone. You've all been great! And I enjoy hearing from all of you, in my life. You make me laugh, you make me cry. You make life worth living. 

Ch 3 Physics Can Be Fun

The night would have been calm without the wind and walking back from the library at 1l: 00, Taylor thought of only one thing: sleeping. Walking alone, stumbling in the dark, auto drive, auto pilot from a sideways map. It all seemed slightly familiar but the words make no sense. Floating through the night. She went to cross the street as a car raced up to the cross walk. Its tires screeched as she unswervingly continued in a sober daze from Physics. It always managed to leave her mind numb and the world opaque. She prepared to flick the driver off after he cursed at her but instead a smiling boy’s face poked out of the passenger side window. “Hey can you give us some directions?” she stopped and slowly turned her head back. He had teeth so white that any moment you expected a spark to twinkle in the corner of his mouth.

“Yeah sure.” She glanced quickly at the car. It was a BMW 332ci and she saw that not only did it have a 2.5-liter dual overhead cam with a 24-valve inline 6-cylinder engine, the owner had gone with the optional sport package and gotten the 17 by 8.0 steer spoke alloy wheels with 225/45R-17 91W performance tires. No wonder he stopped so quickly.

“Can you show me how to get into your pants?”

The textbook for her Electromagnetism and Oscillatory Motion class had 700 pages. And as she hurled it at his Xenon low-beam headlights with auto leveling, Taylor studied the trajectory parabola of the book and calculated that the force she exerted would even do damage to his halogen free fog lights. Smiling she thought ‘Physics can be fun.’

The Flood of 2008

Has this ever happened to you? You spend months without any attention from the opposite sex. You're looking, searching, hunting for some sort of significant connection with another member of your species. But you're coming up dry. You start to resent those happy couples you see kissing in public. That shodenfreuda green covetous angst gets to be too much. But then, without any warning, something in the universe switches. . .

And here come the rain clouds.

I call it a 'flood' and it can be just as devastating and life shattering as a drought. All of a sudden the options start to multiply, and you have countless different suitors coming at you from different angles. 

My normal defenses of logic are powerless against the multitude of different factors. Each suitor or "fan", as someone described it to me recently, has their own timeline, attraction level, benefits and pitfalls. And as torrents of emotion pull you two directions at once, down falls a wave that carries you yet a new direction. 

Oh, the Flood of 2008. Right now it seems that as one wave dissipates, the next one 

levitates, making this water ride less arduous that floods of the past.  But i'm still terrible confused on any given day. My world is upside down. But at least I can enjoy the ride. 

but it's not this bad... yet               

Football!

Fooooootball!!!! First Game of the 2008 season is a little more than a month away. Thursday September 4th my Redskins will be facing the Giants and I can't wait.... EEEEEEE!!!!  Cheers to that and cheers to the fact that my new boss is a Football fan (all be it a Jets fan *hurl*). Cheers to fridays and cheers to getting Zorned. And cheers to you too, ladies...